Fashion sense for ladies
Please don’t get me wrong. I’m a big fan of personal expression. Go ahead - get a tattoo, dye your mohawk bright blue, wear ripped jeans, wear dresses only, wear a top hat and tails. But really, please, have some sense with your fashions.
Here’s some fashion sense for ladies (teens and adults) who insist on appearing in public. (no one cares how you dress in the privacy of your own home). I’ll throw in a few tips for men at the end.
#1 - Your boyfriend’s shirt is not a “dress” - particularly when it doesn’t quite cover your backside.
#2 - Please, for goodness sake, wear a bra. Especially if you’re amply endowed.
#3 - Shirts should cover those parts of the body you’d be arrested for exposing, as well as the parts immediately adjacent to those other parts. If your shirt is cut down to the belly button, either wear another shirt under it, or wear it at home.
#4 - Shirts should NOT have a graphic depiction of those parts of the body you’d be arrested for exposing.
#5 - Didn’t your momma teach you to wear underwear - especially when you’re wearing a mini-skirt?
#6 - Shorts should cover your backside. So should pants. So should skirts. (And ladies, when you wear a skirt, please sit appropriately. If it’s so short when you’re sitting that someone can see up it - it’s too short!
#7 - Clothes should not be so tight that they cut off circulation - whether it’s yours, or that of the people around you.
#8 - Pajamas, especially “sexy” pajamas, are for the bedroom - not for street wear. And if you’re 14, you have no business wearing them.
#9 - Teenage girls, unless you’ve got a serious problem with acne or scarring or somesuch, you really don’t need to wear foundation so thick that it cracks (and if you do have problems you need to cover up, may I recommend a combination of durablend and Bare Minerals, rather than a daily bottle of goo)
#10 - We really, really, really don’t need to see your belly button ring. Really!! Belly shirts are out.
And for the men -
#1 - pull up your pants.
#2 - pull up your pants.
#3 - wear appropriately-sized clothing. A size small pair of spandex shorts on a 250-lb man just makes said man look silly. And I don’t believe for a minute that you intended that to be a belly shirt, did you?
#4 - Personally, I don’t think it’s stylin’ to wear a striped shirt, plaid shorts, black knee socks, and white tennis shoes. But at least you’re covered up.
And to both genders - if you need to appear in court, dress appropriately. Most judges (at least in our area) don’t seem to mind if you wear jeans and tennis shoes, but cover your body, wear clean clothes that don’t smell and aren’t torn, and if you’ve got a big tattoo of a pot leaf on your upper arm, dispense with the muscle shirt, ok? If you don’t have appropriate clothing, five bucks at the Salvation Army will net you something decent.
I’m not sure why the attire I saw on my recent visit to a courtoom (with a friend who had to appear) disturbed me so much - I’m not a lawyer or judge or official or anything. But it did.
I’ll probably add more later.
Got any fashion rules to share??
August 22nd, 2008 at 6:00 am
“Go ahead - get a tattoo, dye your mohawk bright blue, wear ripped jeans, wear dresses only, wear a top hat and tails.”
Might get you kicked out of quite a few churches…….
August 22nd, 2008 at 6:07 am
Not mine
And I’m fairly sure from what he’s said, Rev feels the same way.
We’ve got one dude who comes here that’s got tattoos all over and more than a few facial piercings and gauged ears (I think that’s what he calls them - it’s about a 3/4 inch hole, maybe bigger.) He listens to screamin’ metal music too. (and guess what? He loves Jesus! :D)
August 22nd, 2008 at 6:25 am
I guess my approach is pretty simple these days:
- Is it clean and in good repair? Check.
- Does it cover all the major bits and a fair number of the minor ones? Check.
- Is it appropriate for the occasion? Check.
- Does it go with black as most of my clothes are black? Check.
That’s it really. I really can’t be fussed with the whole fashion thing.
August 22nd, 2008 at 6:57 am
Jules, I wear a lot of black too, and you know what I hate? That I can never find anything that’s the same color of black. And some black things look terrible with other black things. KWIM??
That’s pretty much the way I do clothes, too - Is it clean, does it button, does it fit and cover what needs covered. Most of my “occasions” call for bluejeans, but I sometimes wear a nicer shirt and shoes. Once in a great while.
August 22nd, 2008 at 8:29 am
I seem to recall on one visit we Gothed you up with backcombed hair and dramatic make-up
August 22nd, 2008 at 8:32 am
Wow, the Rev here wears alot of black. I guess I would have turned alot of main line preachers heads Wednesday night as I had on black shorts and a white shirt, oops and guess what the spirit of laughter fell on us and I didn’t get to preach, but God did and one got saved, one got healed and the rest laughed for one and half and our ribs were sore.
August 22nd, 2008 at 10:09 am
Kathi
It helps if you divide your black wardrobe into various shades of black.
Old Goths give in and opt to fade to grey.
August 22nd, 2008 at 12:44 pm
Rev, wish I had been there
August 22nd, 2008 at 1:29 pm
Yeah and that spirit of laughter that hit, it didn’t care about shorts. It cared about people being touched. I will be on vacation all of next week, so I will be absent from here. Can’t wait to get there and get some much needed rest. On a tight schedule. Leaving for Williamsburg, VA in the morning and comeing back next Saturday. thing is every moment is accounted for. Wife thing ya know
August 22nd, 2008 at 1:43 pm
I may be in Williamsburg on Sunday. Love Williamsburg. Enjoy!
August 22nd, 2008 at 2:13 pm
cool I had been there a long time ago and looking forward to it
August 22nd, 2008 at 10:27 pm
I have twenty-two black t-shirts, seven pairs of jeans in blue and black, and five black trenchcoats of various weights and states of repair. For a conference or a funeral or something, I just make sure I’m wearing the nicest black jeans, the best trenchcoat, and matching socks. If I ever go missing, anyone who knows me will know exactly what I’m wearing. I even swim in jeans and a black t-shirt, though I do take the coat off and just put lots of sunblock on my arms.
Now, I myself am morbidly obese, so first I can’t really say anything about anyone, and second I think it’s great when people have a body that they’re comfortable showing off. But I really do think there should be a weight limit of two hundred and fifty pounds on those fringed tank tops.
August 22nd, 2008 at 10:29 pm
Er…NOT that I consider myself a “lady.” The only time people have ever tried to call me that is when they’re trying to convince me that I can’t do heavy lifting.
August 23rd, 2008 at 5:47 am
Speedo’s - NEVER EVER EVER wear speedo’s!
August 24th, 2008 at 2:24 pm
Pull up your pants. Pull up ypur pants. Pull up your pants. Better yet, wear a belt!
Ladies, cover your lady bits. Honor yourself, and honor your brothers by protecting their chastity! Same goes for men. Don’t give me a reason to stop mid-sentence and watch you walk by. If you’re attractive, you can cover up and still look good.
August 27th, 2008 at 11:33 pm
Oh, well, now, I do rather appreciate the folks who can make me stop in mid-sentence and watch them walk by. Those are folks who have made fashion into an art form. And some of ‘em are Arthur Rackham and some of ‘em are Francis Bacon, but the world is their gallery, and I appreciate them making it a bit more interesting.